Game 77 Recap

Al Leiter's Magic Baseball

Top of the 6th inning in YES broadcast booth:

Leiter: Michael, have you ever said to yourself, "Gee, How do those guys do it? It must be hard to be a Major League pitcher".

Kay: Sure, just look at the torque these put on their arms. It's amazing that they can make it through one pitch without getting injured, let alone a whole season, let alone a 19 year career like you, Al.

Leiter: Well, have you ever wished that you were out there on the mound, throwing high heat and snapping off nasty curveballs?

Kay: I used to when I was a boy growing up as a big Yankee fan in the Bronx, sure.

Leiter: Well now you can, with Al Leiter's Magic Baseball®! Here it comes... Nah-na-na-na-na-na-non-on-no-no-on...

Leiter: Watch, this is how you can throw a blazing 87mph fastball like I did when I was playing! You just go like this.

Leiter: And then it's like 'Whooooohhhhssshhhh'...

Leiter: And 'Ssssssssssfffffffvvvvvrrrrrrrmmmmm'...

Leiter: POP! Steeeeeerikkkee threee! YOU'RE OUTTA THERE!!1!1

Did you catch that?

Kay: I did. You apparently struck that batter out with one pitch.

Leiter: Use your imagination, Michael! Did I mention I used to be a Major League pitcher?

Kay: You did, Al. And the 1-0 from Matusz...

Kay: And Gardner swings and misses at a...

Leiter: (/interrupting) Okay, now look at the curve. It comes in like this... 'Peeeeeeeewwwwwwwwww'

Leiter: Then drops off like this 'Kkkkkkkkksssssssssssttttttttt'...

Leiter: And 'Bbbzzzzoooooooommmmmm.... pffffftt'. Steeeeeeeerrrrikkkkke!

Kay: Al, I don't really see how this baseball is "magic".

Leiter: Okay, it's not actually magic, it just has little wings that pop out and a jet engine in the back!

Kay: That just looks like a regular baseball , Al.

Leiter: It's not, it's not! It's Al Leiter's Magic Baseball® and it's perfect for completely pointless stationary demonstrations done in office chairs on baseball broadcasts.

Kay: But it's not magic, so you probably shouldn't say that it is.

Leiter: I can't say anything I want and I don't have to listen to you! (/plugs ears) Lalalalalalalalalalala!

Kay: ARE YOU SEVEN FUCKING YEARS OLD, AL?!?! PUT. THE. BALL. DOWN.

Kay: There. Now sit still, be quiet and watch the game.

Leiter: (/pouting) I want more candy!

Kay: Give me that.

(/proceeds to eat all of it)

f i n

Last Night à La Mode

On Tuesday, one of our longtime commenters, Mode (who does some writing himself), mentioned that he was going to be attending last night's game. He said:

I got great seats right behind the Yankee dugout for tomorrow night's game (a bargain at $175 a pop). Hopefully the weather doesn't mess things up since I am loooking forward to watching Hughes pitch.

Look for me behind the dugout sporting my vintage (and well worn) Columbus Clippers hat.

Further down in the comments, he and Matt discussed which version of the Clippers' logo his hat had and Matt let him know that we'd be looking for him during the came.

As Hughes mowed down the A's last night in dominating fashion, made a run at a no-hitter and set a career high in strikeouts, Matt and I chatted on GMail and both kept and eye out for a blue hat with a red "C" and a sailboat on it. As the camera pulled away from a shot of Phil Hughes' parents and former Yankee, Angel, Giant & Red Sock J.T. Snow in the top of the 4th, Matt thought he might have caught a glimpse of a Clippers hat behind the visitor's dugout. But upon further review, it was not.

However, after the game concluded, Ken Singleton kicked it down to Kim Jones so she could interview Hughes' parents, and look who was standing right behind Phil's mom, Dori:

The MLB.tv broadcast cut out about three seconds after they switched to his camera angle so this is the best screengrab I could get, but on the live telecast the interview lasted for a couple of minutes and Mode was just kickin' it in the background, prompting this praise from Ben Kabak of River Ave. Blues:

A+, indeed and $175 well spent, sir.

Mode lives about an hour away from the Coliseum and last night is about as good as it gets for an displaced fan of any club: your favorite team stops by, a young pitcher has a an awesome start, your guys hit back-to-back triples and win a close contest in exciting fashion.

If you live within a reasonable commute of Yankee Stadium chances are that you take for granted the option to go to as many games as you can fit into your schedule and afford - I know I did when I lived on the Upper West Side and still do to some extent now that I'm Upstate. But if you live out of town - even if you're lucky enough to live in a city that the Yanks visit - you are at the whim of their schedule and have to hope it works out in one of the few times you have a chance to go. In true California fashion, Mode caught this wave right when it was cresting and rode it for all it was worth. I'm sure he'll have more in the comments at some point.

Matsui's Reception

Matt already summed up Hideki Matsui's warm welcome back to the Bronx in the recap of of the home opener and Jason added another part of the story that wasn't obvious on the broadcast in the comments, but I wanted to capture some of the images that YES showed of fans in the stands.

That yellow Godzilla banner is a familiar site and the woman in the blue jacket appears to be holding up an "MVP" sign. We'll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that there is more it than we can see.

Two guys who don't appear to be Japanese are holding up the flag of Matsui's home country. Probably big fans of his looking to show their appreciation. That's an awfully nice gesture.

Dude.

I don't think using the fictitious solicitations of a prostitute from a movie is the best way to convey to Matsui how much his contributions to the franchise meant to you, unless you are propositioning him for sex on behalf of the entire fanbase. And by the way, Full Metal Jacket was about the Vietnam War, you dummy. Hideki Matsui is Japanese, remember? Can you see why some people might find that offensive? No? Do I have to get Gunnery Sargent Hartman to explain it to you, maggot? BULLSHIT, I CAN'T HEAR YEAR YOU!

Is this guy an insensitive asshole who is making a somewhat racist joke? Just a clueless moron who doesn't know the origin of the reference? Some combination of the two? So many questions...

O's Fever: Catch It!

Last night, Camden Yards played host to the smallest crowd in it's history: 9,129.

Granted, the O's were playing their fourth home game, squarely in the slow period after the rush to get out to the first series has worn off but before summer has arrived and the kids are out of school. They were also off to a 1-5 start (now 1-6), it was a Monday night and the Rays in town, who have a good team but few displaced fans in other cities. Still, with a solid young core like Baltimore has, you'd think it a few more people* would have made it out.

While Camden Yards is still the face of the "New Ballpark Movement", any novelty has long worn off. It doesn't seem like it, but the park is now hosting it's 18th season and is actually due for some renovations over the next year or two. As Craig notes, there are now only 10 parks older than Camden.

It's quite jarring to see the place so empty, but when the Yanks come to town at the end of the month, surely there will be fewer of those seats unoccupied.

*Noted stoner and manfish Michael Phelps was in the crowd. No word on whether or not he tried to toke some herb out of a red pepper.

YOUK GETS FACKIN' LAID THE FACK OUT!!!1!1!!

[I had to take a bunch of screen grabs and turn them into a movie file, so I apologize for the choppy quality.]

Quick thoughts in no particular order:

• For a guy that has been hit by 52 pitches in his career and hangs over the plate like he's drunk at a urinal, Youk sure takes getting hit pretty personally.
  
  
• You have to appreciate any baseball fight where the two combatants actually make contact with each other.
  
  
• I appreciate this one even more for obvious reasons.
  
  
• Youk really threw his helmet at Porcello? I mean, it's better than keeping your catcher's mask on like a certain pussy on the Red Sox I'm thinking of, but that's pretty weak.
  
  
• Porcello has his arms up and backs away like he wants nothing to do with the fight, but ends up tossing Youk anyway. Well done, sir. Nominee for the Fack Youk Hall of Fame? We shall see...

Enjoy your suspensions, gentlemen!

Sorry A-Rod, They Can't All Be Hotties

In and of it itself, the 58 minute rain delay was quite annoying, but this totally made up for it.




What did we learn guys?

Professional Athletes + High School Girls = Aaaaaaawwwwkwarrrrd

Brian Bruney Is A Renegade

No, I'm talking talking about the tattoo.

Brian Bruney is back from the DL, he's got a bad ass motherfuckin' mustache and he doesn't give a shit about that damn patch commemorating the first season at the New Stadium the fuckin' MAN is tryin' to get him to wear.

Brian Bruney does what Brain Bruney wants, thank you very much.

(Below: Where the patch should be, as displayed

by upright citizen Joba Chamberlain)

(And by the way, yes, we would have nabbed a shot of Mo batting if Jason didn't beat us to it.)

"And On The FIRST Pitch..."

Given that it's not 1920, I'm guessing most people weren't huddled up by their radio on a lovely Friday night, listening to the Yankees game. Well fortunately for you, I have secured a (very low quality) version of John Sterling and Suzyn Waldman's call of A-Rod's home run and put it behind a screenshot slideshow to preserve it in internet eternity (interity?):



Sterling: You know one thing, Suzyn? And I've seen this in tennis...

Ah yes, the classic tennis story. I've heard it a million times: Player's former coach reveals that their nickname was ____-Fraud, only to have everyone forget about those revelations when they are caught with a positive result on a steroid test, blah blah blah, everyone hates the guy, turns out he's got a torn hip labrum... then he kisses a mirror for a magazine shoot, someone writes a tell-all book about him and takes so many pot shots that people eventually start to feel bad for him... and here we are. 

My personal favorite part is where Suzyn says: 

"Well, I don't know who's in this park, but this entire park standing, orange t-shirts, blue t-shirts, they are giving this guy a standing ovation. (Crowd Boos)"

"This entire park?" Does she really expect us to believe this? So, even the people with the Styrofoam needles? If you are any Orioles fan, why would you applaud this? "Woohoo, our division rival just got their best player back and he smashed a three run homer off of us! I don't care if he took steroids... Good for him!!! But that Mark Teixeira asshole? BOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" Are you trying to tell me the Selena Roberts backlash polarized everyone that badly?

Anyway, could you have drawn it up any better? A-Rod took the pressure off him and the Yankees with one swing of the bat. CC turned in a gem and all of a sudden, the outlook isn't so bleak. 

Come And Go Blues

The show started just before 8:30. And they opened with a live version of Little Martha backed by a slideshow of Duane and the early days.


At the beginning of Statesboro Blues, Derek's guitar wasn't working...

And then about three minutes later, it was my internet that wasn't working.

Awesome timing. It's not like I had been waiting for this for an entire week or anything...

That pretty much sums it up right there. I was running a cable and was connected to two different wireless networks that I usually steal from, so it wasn't just my issue. The whole area was down.

Even Billy in 4C couldn't help a brother out.

This felt exactly like the time when I was still playing online poker for a "living" and flopped four jacks at a final table. I had the second biggest chip stack in play and was about to run away with the tournament (provided my opponent didn't draw two perfect runners to a straight flush) when my internet shat out. Once the 90 second disconnect grace period was up, the other player, who could have had two pair or some bullshit, probably just made the minimum bet and my hand was automatically folded. By the time the connection came back 45 minutes later, my stack had been blinded down to a measly pittance and I ended up in 7th place.

Except that's not how this ended.

After almost two hours of watching the 'Zags zap the Zips and other NCAA Tournament action (which isn't a terrible consolation prize) the internet rose from the dead right in the middle of Good Morning Little School Girl.

Immediately after the song, Greg announced Clapton and they broke into Key to the Highway.

DreamsWhy Does Love Got To Be So Sad

Little Wing

Anyday

Encore Break:

Layla (Piano jam)

The two hours without internet were pretty brutal. Any two hours of my life spent indoors without access to broadband is inconvenient, but I had been looking forward to this and hyping it up for a week. And you know, the main reason that I bought Moogis was to be able to watch this show live.

On the other hand, what made this show so sick was Clapton, and I caught every note of the songs he stood in on. Not to mention that the song selection was awesome. I got my wish for Why Does Love Got To Be So Sad, so tomorrow I'll be out on the town and will turn my password over to Cliff, who is probably the biggest Clapton fan I know. Enjoy it, homey.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go move my car which I spent two hours in searching for a spot last night, before I ended up parking on the same block I was on, on the same side of the street.

The Allmans & Clapton

Key to the Highway
Dreams
Why Does Love got To Be So Sad
[Ed. Note: YESSSSS]
Little Wing
Anyday (with Susan Tedeschi)

Encore:
Layla