Tuesday, January 13, 2009

List of Things to Do Before Pitchers and Catchers Report

All of us here at Fack Youk have entered the dreadful “Dark Ages”—the time between when our favorite NFL team has been knocked out of the Playoffs and when Pitchers and Catchers report to Spring Training (February 14th for Los Yankees).

Here is a non-prioritized list of what to do during these difficult times.

1. NCAA Hoops.
2. Be productive at work/school
3. Take over the blogosphere
4. Deliver an ultimatum to Andy Pettitte and the Yankees to get their act together for the sake of #27.
5. “Get the things on my nuts looked at” (Will)
6. Not watch the Knicks. Ever.
7. Drink. Heavily.
8. Cuse basketball
9. “Playoffs?! Are you kidding me?!”
10. Mass Suicide
11. BC Hockey
12. Exercise…
13. Not call the girl from the East Village with the dumb hat (Jay)
14. Fantasy Baseball Research
15. Pretend to like hockey
16. Watch 24.
17. Damn, no NASCAR either? WTF?!
18. Leave the city of Philadelphia if the Eagles make it to the Super Bowl (Cliff)
19. Get a job
20. Catch up on writing hate mail to various teams, coaches and players
21. Yoga
22. Create voodoo dolls of various coaches and players
23. Watch illegally downloaded movies
24. Hate the fat slob you have become over the Holidays
25. Snowboarding
26. FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS
27. Hit up The Latin Quarter or the buffett at HeadQuarters
28. Imagine various scenarios in which Donovan McNabb gets gobbled up by a road grater.
29. Mock NFL Drafts.
30. 4 months until the WNBA!!!!!!!
31. English Premier League/Primera Liga/Serie A/Bundesliga
32. File for Unemployment
33. Travel
34. Attend Rehab/AA meetings
35. Try to replace sporting events with concerts
36. Drink. Heavily.
37. American Idol!
38. Debate Super Bowl Commercials
39. The (hopefully) Stephon Marbury led Celtics.
40. Stalk people on Facebook
41. Wait for SI Swimsuit Issue
42. Extreme Beer Fest in Boston 2/20 and 2/21
43. Watch Seinfeld reruns
44. Punch brick walls
45. Marathon session of NBA 2K9 on XBox Live
46. Start Ponzi Scheme
47. Get laid (not likely)
48. Pray for Snow Days
49. Move out of parents basement (also not likely)
50. Drink. Heavily.

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