One Fewer Crappy Ballpark

Considering they play in the AL Central, it might be a little too soon to throw dirt on the Twins' playoff chances and hence another trip to the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome. However, we might as well touch on it now while the experience is fresh in our collective minds, just in case.

It's great that the beat writers found the place to be a nice work environment. Tyler Kepner enjoyed the climate control and the open air press box. Peter Abraham appreciated the view from the box, the fact that it situated only a few flights of stairs from the field and the friendly employees of the Metrodome.

Bully for those gents, but you guys aren't baseball writers, are you? Do you live in Minnesota? Google Analytics says a few of you do. But by and large, to us fans, the Metrodome was nothing more than a gigantic set that one of the TV shows that we like to watch used one or two times a year. And it was a tremendously shitty one at that.

As usual, Cliff from Bronx Banter nails it:

Baseball simply wasn’t meant to be played indoors, on artificial surface, under a baseball-colored roof that disguised fly balls, in front of huge air conditioning vents that mysteriously blew harder when the home team was batting, with a oversized Hefty bag for an outfield wall.

Next year, the Twins will be playing outdoors, on grass, in an actual ballpark rather than a multi-purpose dome. Had that been the case on Thursday, the game would have taken place on a lovely, warm, sunny afternoon. Instead it took place inside under gloomy artificial light.

I'm not sure that Target Field is going to be the greatest place to play in April or October, when the average highs are in the mid-fifties and the lows are in the 30's, but getting to watch a few more baseball games played outside will be a cosmic leap forward. So good riddance to the baggy, and the vampire seats, and the field turf. The aesthetics of watching baseball on TV just got better.

Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Compton

Good morning Fackers. I have to travel once every month or so for my job. In the past few years, this has enabled me to take in games at Safeco Field in Seattle, Minute Maid Park in Houston, and Fenway Park. Actual work got in the way of me going to the Metrodome, Citizens Bank Park, Comiskey Park, and Rogers Center.

This summer I'll be stuck in the hell hole that is Southern California for a full week. Both the Dodgers and Angels will be in town during that time frame. Since Anaheim will be my base of operations in that time, I was figuring on getting to at least one Angels game.

Then late Wednesday night came the news that following the Angels-Rockies game that evening, there was a parking lot altercation that resulted in someone taking a beer bottle to the skull and an off duty cop using his department issued firearm on two of the hooligans, leaving one critical and one in serious condition. This all comes following an Opening Day concourse altercation that left a fan dead. Dead! I may have to reconsider my plans.

For the past five years, the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim have been the punch line of quite a few jokes thanks to their ludicrous name. They were a 1961 expansion franchise initially known as the Los Angeles Angels, named after the old Pacific Coast League team. In 1965, in preparation for their move twentyfive miles southeast to Anaheim, they renamed themselves the California Angels. In 1997, finally realizing the four other MLB franchise called the Golden State home, they changed to the Anaheim Angels, before settling on their current moniker for the 2005 season. Turns out the Anaheim is a bit closer to South Central L.A. than previously thought.

Diamonds

It's only natural that comparisons between baseball and football start to pop up this time of year. In recent years, Hardball and Pigskin have begun to separate themselves as the two most popular sports in the US, and writers are looking for a way to transition from the Super Bowl into Spring Training. As you may have noticed, all of the contributors on this blog are big fans of both sports.

Via IIATMS, Richard Justice gives 10 "reasons" why baseball is better than football. If they were good, I probably wouldn't have bothered to write this post.

2. Skill level

Hitting a baseball is the hardest thing to do in sports. Throwing a baseball from 60 feet, 6 inches is the second-hardest thing. The NFL has some phenomenal athletes. None of them is[sic] as gifted as Albert Pujols, Lance Berkman and Roy Oswalt.

I would say getting past a guy who runs a 4.4 40 yard dash and catching a 45MPH pass in the corner of the endzone while still dragging both of your feet on the ground is probably harder than either of those things. This is just a dumb argument made by average-sized white people to explain to themselves that if they only were born with more skill, they could have cracked the Bigs. And Lance Berkman is a fat shit. If we are talking about being "gifted" Justin Tuck is Christmas and Lance Berkman is Easter.

3. Diamonds - It's[sic] still one of God's greatest creations. It's perfection on every level. Next time you walk into Minute Maid Park, take a moment to appreciate it. From the perfectly trimmed grass to the raked infield dirt to the chalked lines, it's about the base[sic] place on earth to spend a few hours. No matter how bad a day I've had, stress flows from me when I see a big league diamond.

Actual diamonds may or may not be "God's creation", but a baseball diamond is most certainly man's creation, unless there are some naturally-formed infields along a deserted stretch of the Chilean coastline no one has ever told me about. And you really picked Minute Maid Park, the same place with a fucking ramp in centerfield?

4. Ballparks - Baseball's worst parks are better than football's best. If you've ever spent an evening at Dodger Stadium, you'd understand. It's both tranquil and energizing if one place can be both. If you're really lucky, you'll someday stand on the right-field concourse at AT&T Park and admire the view of the bay, the odor of garlic fries, the majesty of the place.

So the HHH Metrodome or fucking Tropicana Field are better than Gillette Stadium or Qwest Field? Football stadiums sell out almost every game all season long, with crowds of about 70,000 people. I like baseball's venues better too, and hardly ever go to football games, but that is some ham-handed hyperbole. And I'm not quite sure "the odor of garlic fries" at one place really factors into a comparison between roughly 60 stadiums. There are probably NFL stadiums that have pretty good culinary options as well.

And you really put those two back to back? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say you probably could have combined "Ball Park" and "Diamonds" (part of a ballpark) into one point.

7. Cheerleaders - Football has 'em. Baseball doesn't.

Rich... you're making the case for baseball, remember? Are the cheerleaders so offensive that you can't stand the 12 second clips they show of them coming in and out of commercials? And not every football team "has 'em"; the Giants don't. I'll take cheerleaders over fucking Cotton Eyed Joey twelve times out of ten.