Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Words/Phrases You Would Never Hear Without Steroids

If there is a positive about the Steroids fallout, it is the new or previously underused words and phrases that have been cemented into our everyday vocabulary:

"Abscess"--Apparently something you after you stick a needle in your ass.

"B-12"--As in "It was only B12, not steroids!". A water soluble vitamin with a key role in the normal functioning of the brain and nervous system, and for the formation of blood. It is one of the eight B vitamins. It is normally involved in the metabolism of every cell of the body, especially affecting DNA synthesis and regulation, but also fatty acid synthesis and energy production.

"Categorically deny"--An absolute denial.

"Culture"--No, not Boy George and his band of ferries. As in it is part of baseball culture to do steroids.

"Everybody was doing it"--No, not teenage sex. Not marijuana or cocaine either. Rather, sticking needles up your ass.

"Inject"--To stick something in your ass that will eventually give you an abscess.

"It is what it is"--Everyone--What is it? How is it? Was it always like that? Most things are what they are, no?

"Loosey-Goosey"--A-Rod. According to the Urban Dictionary, "loosey-goosey" means "
Not following prescribed guidelines or general societal expectations. Very casual. Bypassing certain boundaries." It can also mean a "a very loosely rolled joint or rollie", an individual cigarette sold at a bodega, or a certain body part after a certain type of sex.

"Metabolite" (an actual word)--Jose Canseco. According to Wikipedia, metabolites are the intermediates and products of metabolism. The term metabolite is usually restricted to small molecules.

"Misremember"--Roger Clemens. To forget.

"Performance Enhancing"--No, not Viagra or Cialis!

"The Clear"--No, not the people in The Mitchell Report or that list of 104 names that was foolishly not destroyed by the MLBPA. Tetrahydrogestrinone. THG for short. Most famous users include Barry Bonds and Gary Sheffield.

"The Cream"--No, not money, as in "Cash Rules Everything Around Me" as rapped about by the Wu-Tang Clan, or the 1960s British band headed by Eric Clapton and Ginger Baker. The cream is a steroid that is applied to the body to mask THG. The yin to "The Clear's" yang.

"The Truth"--Obliterated.

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