Sunday, December 28, 2008

Why Tony Romo Sucks Balls: A Non-In-Depth Analysis Of The Choke Artist Know As Tony Romo

For those of you that have heard me talk (bitch) about the Giants and their trials and tribulations, then you know that I have been calling Tony Romo a fucking choke artist for 3 years. This fucking pole smoker gets thrown in there after Bledsoe, does OK for a few games, and all of a sudden ESPN and every Dallas sympathizer anoints him one of the best QBs in the league. Well you know what? Fuck that, fuck them, fuck Romo, and fuck you too.

Here are my examples:

06-07 Season: He fumbled the snap/hold on the FG attempt in the playoffs, which I hear everyone saying that they used a special ball that was slippery. Everyone that says that can go fuck themselves. At least 31 other people did this job without one person bitching. But Romo fucks up, bitches (along with his teammates, coach, and owner) and the ball gets changed. This is reason #1 why Romo is a fucking faggot and can never win the big game.

07-08 Season: The Great Tony Romo and the Cowgirls are about to host the New York Football Giants in a divisional playoff game. I'll spare you the entire analysis of the game, but basically the Romo's were down 21-17 with less than a minute in the game and Romo throws a pick in the end zone to R.W. McQuarters, ending their season. I don't really remember because I drink a lot but I am sure ESPN and the rest of the Romo loving media had all the excuses out about that play before McQuarters even took a knee.

08-09 Season Week 17 vs. Eagles: Win and you're in, lose and we'll see you next year. I stopped watching this abortion of a game after the Romo's second turnover, a fumble, was returned for a touchdown. What the fuck? Way to show up to the biggest game of the season. As I write this there are probably some douchebags out there writing about how it was Pacman's or whoever's fault, but ultimately it falls on Romo (that fucking failure) because he did not put his team in a position to win.

There are many more reasons why Romo is a choker, douchebag, and big time fag, but I would like to go to sleep sometime this week so I won't write them all. Please feel free to share your favorite Romo failure or dumbass reason why he isn't a failure in the comment section.


  1. And everyone thought it was Jessica Simpson...

  2. What about when that worthless Piece of shit threw an INT which lost the game to the Steelers?

  3. Jay, that was BS, i wouldnt blame those awesome titties for anything

  4. At the beginning of the season I was all about being fair to Tony the Homo Choke Artist because Eli was also a choke artist in the playoffs for his first 2 starting seasons before winning it all last year. I was reserving judgment on Romo until he played the same amount of seasons as Eli. Well now he has and he is a choking fag. How about him collapsing in the locker room after today's game?