Today In Meaningless Clichés

To be fair, Anthony McCarron wrote this yesterday, but that's not going to stop me from making fun of him for it this morning, Fackers:

They are looking for a right-handed hitter. Sounds like Johnny Damon hasn’t got a shot unless he’s willing to play on the seriously cheap, which isn't likely to happen. So who do you like? Reed Johnson? Jerry Hairston, Jr.? Xavier Nady?

Me, I think they need to add someone, preferably a get-the-uniform-dirty type. But I also think they ought to give Brett Gardner a real chance.

Me, I'd like a keeps-his-uniform-clean-so-he-doesn't-have-to-wash-it-very-often type. Saves money for the team, to say nothing of the benefits for the environment, you know?

I know this "dirty uniform" tag gets tossed around a lot, but what does it actually mean? Someone who steals bases? A guy who is willing to slide to catch the ball? Are extra points awarded for grass stains? (They are harder to remove after all...)

Is it someone who sits Indian-style in the on-deck circle and makes fucking sand castles? Or is it just another meaningless moniker for a scrappy, gritty, feisty, battling, pugnacious, rough-and-tumble bench grunt who plays with a chip on his shoulder (otherwise known as someone who isn't good enough to land a starting job somewhere else)?

McCarron doesn't elaborate on what he means by this at all. He doesn't even offer up even one example of a uniform dirtier that the Yankees could sign. In fact, he sort of implies that Brett Gardner isn't sufficient in his garb grubbying, thus necessitating the acquisition of another shirt stainer.

Is this filthy enough for you, Anthony? Does Reed Johnson meet your standards of uncleanliness?