Friday, October 9, 2009

Youk's Teammates Hate Him Too!

Well, some of them do, anyway:
So why, then, is this Everyman not unequivocally embraced and revered by his teammates? Why, when a reporter approaches another key Red Sox player to speak about Youkilis does he respond, “I’d rather refrain’’?

It should be Youk’s team, his clubhouse, and it might be some day, but some of his peers believe Youkilis still has some growing to do. They’d like to see him filter some of his strongly held opinions. They’d like him to respect the veteran protocol that has long been a part of baseball’s fabric. And they want him to control his temper.


“At one point some of the veterans came up to me and said, ‘Can you talk to this guy?’ ’’ manager Terry Francona said. “What I tried to tell them was Youk just needs to get it out of his system. Watch him sometime. Thirty seconds after his outburst, he’s screaming for his teammates.
Isn't that fackin' chaaahming? The dood's like a fackin' fwah yeah old!

This quote from Jackie MacMullan was also pretty amusing:
He does not look like an MVP candidate; more a refrigerator repairman, a butcher, the man selling hammers behind the counter at the True Value hardware store.
To that I would add:
  • Fishmonger
  • Car stereo salesman
  • Longshoreman
  • Mason
  • Ice road trucker
  • HVAC technician
  • Short order cook
  • Plumber
  • Dickhead bouncer at a college bar
  • Elementary school janitor
  • Harley Davidson mechanic
  • Mover
  • UPS guy
  • Short bus driver
  • Hot tar roofer
  • Landscaper
  • Electrician
  • Garbage man
  • Road paver
  • Street sweeper
  • Finish carpenter
  • Carpet installer
  • Park ranger
  • Chicken farmer
  • Sausage stuffer
  • Coal miner
  • Steel worker
  • Forklift operator
  • Mr. Clean stand-in
  • The guy with the awful beard from the Sam Adams commercials.
I might even admit that the article is actually a good read if I wanted to jeopardize the stranglehold we've developed on Kevin Youkilis hatred over here, but you know I can't do that.


  1. Hilarious... nice work on the photoshops! I can literally picture him doing all of those things.

  2. Youk seems more like a doors/windows/siding type of dude to me...

  3. It really irks me how Sox fans love him because he slams his helmet when he strikes out and he swears and throws things and oh my look how much he cares!

    And when other players (Bay, Drew, Lowell) don't do the same, it's cuz they don't care as much as Youk.


  4. Very similar to the Paul O'Neill dynamic with Yankee fans, Smarty. Losing your temper is somehow endearing to the fans, even though it's a pretty childish character flaw to carry over into your profession.

  5. What the fuck is wrong with being a UPS guy or a car stereo salesman? You Yankees fags are elitist asshole pricks. What do you do for a living?

  6. I'm a bathroom attendant, but I look like a fucking CEO!

    I never said there was anything wrong with doing any of those things man, chill out.

  7. Ahhh Jay.
    I do love your blog.
    Thanks for the great post.

  8. Appreciate it Wendy. At least someone doesn't think I'm an elitist asshole prick.

  9. I think Terry Francona is a bag of sh*t